


A Friend In Need Is A Friend Dressed In Spots and Spandex

by orphan_account



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alya Césaire Is The Best, Alya Césaire Knows, Alya and Nino to the rescue, Alya is The Man™, F/F, F/M, Graphic Depictions of Guy Fieri, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I don't usually do angst, I'll try to keep the angst light, M/M, Major Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Matchmakers Alya Césaire & Nino Lahiffe, Nino is The Man™, Oblivious Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir and Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, These lovebirds are Paris's greatest heroes' greatest heroes, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Warning: Donald Trump, We're gonna say they have 5 hours in the suit without using their special power, basically the whole superhero gang trope, it's fine tho, maybe adding nsfw later, no honestly they're great, rated for language, remember that now kids, squad shenanigans, that's probably not a problem tho, we stan a queen (Alya), ya'll are a buncha sickos
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-12
Packaged: 2019-10-25 19:53:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17731574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Since Marinette Dupain-Cheng and Adrien Motherfucking Agreste are apparently blind AND deaf, it's everyone's favorite reporter Alya Césaire's job to bring the greatest OTP since Klance to life.Basically, Alya and Nino lend a hand to the dorks and get them to cut their shit.





	A Friend In Need Is A Friend Dressed In Spots and Spandex

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to superhero hell. Here, have a pile of dog shit. Hope it smells like lavender~~~~!!1!1!1!

_Thump._

 

The floorboards creaked as Marinette landed ever so gracefully through her trapdoor and into her lavish room, the shine from the detransformation washing it in a bright pink for a split-second. Tikki twirled into physical form with a high-pitched giggle, and Marinette laughed with her as she sprawled out on her couch. That evening’s akuma had been a cat-themed old lady, and the amount of puns Chat Noir had made was astounding. Not only that, but Rena Rouge (who she’d only recruited to help with the sheer amount of stray cats appearing everywhere) had made the night so much more fun, and taking care of the akumas had seemed a little bit less than a serious chore.

 

As the laughter subsided and she wiped a tear from her eye, they started idly chatting as Marinette tweaked at a dress, paper, fabric and thread spread across the floor. She liked to create as she waited; it always passed the time faster. This time, Alya was coming over to work with her on the French essay. The minutes passed slowly, and Tikki hovered around her head, twitching this way and that as she told story upon story.

  
  
  
  


She couldn’t believe it.

 

There was no way. No, no, not in a million years. Marinette was so clumsy and easily nervous and always tripping around and-- and brave. She was brave and could be _so_ smooth when she wanted and she fought with all she had for what was right. She was honest, too, and forgiving. She was always disappearing with the appearance of an akuma and reappearing as soon as it was vanquished, and-- Jesus Christ, the _pigtails._

 

With each passing moment Alya gazed at the small form and smaller face that dropped out of the skylight from the shadows and saw her greatest friend and greatest idol blend together.

 

A small smile gently played at her lips. Not the trademarked mischievous smile that her face was more often than not adorned with- no, this was one of joy.

 

Well, maybe with a sprinkle of mischievousness.

 

Alya slowly lowered the trapdoor to Marinette’s room and sat back on her haunches, balancing on one stair and listening to Marinette shuffle around and talk to a high-pitched voice- her kwami. She gave it a few minutes before rapping on the door twice, opening it, and crawling inside.

 

“Hey, Marinette! I brought my homework with me, and those batteries you needed for Mecha Strike III,” she started enthusiastically, pretending to look down and shuffle through her homework.

 

Looking up, she saw her friend smiling nervously, no doubt having rushed to hide her kwami. She resisted the urge to chuckle, and smothered her laugh in the task of getting her work spread out on the desk. Three chocolate chip cookies piled up in the corner caught her eye. That must’ve been what her kwami ate- Marinette was more of a macarons girl.

 

They soon slipped into a steady beat of working for a while, then taking a break to play a round or two of Mecha Strike, chatting all the while. As soon as Sabine called up the stairs that Marinette had to have dinner, Alya bid the family goodnight and dashed back home, already formulating the very best ways to cover for Marinette when it came to superheroing.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

She was falling.

 

It was fast and it was loud and it was stupid, this whole thing was stupid and it shouldn’t have happened and that dumb cat wasn’t there to save her.

 

She would never see her dumb, stupid cat and his dumb, stupid smirk again.

 

She plummeted to the ground, faster and faster as the akumatized civilian- previously a pilot- smirked from above. She fell faster and faster, her yo-yo falling uselessly above her. It might as well have been a wet ribbon trailing in the wind.

 

Chat vaulted across the skyline, his legs pumping and breath constricting as he ran viciously towards the life he knew he couldn’t save. He wouldn’t make it in time. His Lady- he couldn’t save her. His mind was shrinking and it was hard to think and he pushed harder, seeing red as his world seemed to disappear. He was going to lose her.

 

She watched as the intricate streets of Paris grew ever closer, and for once it was terrifying to see its beauty up close. Tears welled in her eyes and slipped away, and she wished she could’ve told Chat goodbye. He would no doubt take this out on himself, that dumb, stupid, cocky cat. The ground grew ever closer, and she closed her eyes. She closed her eyes and reached out for Tikki, her ever-present guiding force. They couldn’t speak directly when she was suited up, but she could feel Tikki’s every emotion. Now, she felt terror, fear, and an overwhelming devastation unrivaled by any she’d known. She could feel as Tikki wept, and she whispered under her breath, so broken and scared and empty, a single phrase: “Goodbye, Tikki.”

 

And then it was over. There was a blinding light and suddenly no more hurt and no more fear and Marinette Dupain-Cheng felt at peace. An eternity seemed to pass before the light subsided.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It took a moment before her senses kickstarted and the panicked voices faded in. It took longer for her eyes to flutter open tentatively, and she registered relief in the murmurs and quivering breaths around her. Slowly two fuzzy shapes formed into Rena Rouge and Chat Noir, a halo of sunlight above them.

 

“H...hey guys,” she choked out quietly, her voice cracking and limbs throbbing.

 

Suddenly she was drawn into a shaky hug, her friends piling around her and laughing wholeheartedly, tears drying on both faces. She gripped them right back, not caring about the overwhelming pain in her wrist.

 

“Ladybug- Ladybug, we thought we lost you.. Oh my god, Ladybug!” Chat cried, hugging harder. “If Rena- Rena hadn’t... hadn’t done that- ”

 

Rena Rouge let out a chuckle, a sad smile seeping through red eyes. “I just… I kinda felt this thing, felt that someone was in trouble- I didn’t know who- and I kinda just... _found_ the fox miraculous.” She shrugged, as if confused about it herself, then smiled wider. “And then I jumped off a building.”

 

The overwhelmingly relieved laughter of two teenagers reverberated around the gravelled roof where Rena Rouge caught Ladybug from falling to her death. The third teenager, adorned in a leather catsuit and rather shaken expression, merely snuggled closer to the lying Ladybug while Rena sat on her knees to check her for injuries.

 

Chat Noir held Ladybug as tight as he could, heart pounding and breath uneven. As he tried to wrestle with his erratic heartbeat and waves of guilt- _he’d almost lost her_ \- he tucked his head into the crook of her neck, breathing in the beautiful scent of a warm bakery and family and love. She wrapped both of her arms around him, and asked him what was wrong.

 

She almost died, that’s what was wrong.

 

Fresh tears burst forth and Chat melted into Ladybug, all shaky sobs and frightened sniffles. He let guilt and fear take over, because _why was he so stupid_ and _she almost fucking died, dipshit_ and _he would’ve let her die, he would’ve let her slip through his fingers like dough and crash to the ground and Ladybug would’ve been_ **_gone_ ** _and-_

 

Ladybug shushed him, brought a hand to his cheek and murmured that it was alright, she was here and she wasn’t going anywhere and _it wasn’t your fault, Chaton_. Her soothing words brought Chat back down to earth, slowly calming him and his sobs subsided with time. She reminded him of his mother, and he suddenly felt at home.

 

“Wait, what happened to the akuma?!” Ladybug shot up after a while longer of gentle reassurance.

 

Chat perked up, obviously in a better mood, and smiled. “You know how my suit has pockets and yours doesn’t? Well, apparently they’re the only thing besides the yo-yo that can contain akumas. We captured it and- here, I’ll let it go if you wanna’ purify it.”

 

Chat zipped open the pocket containing the akuma, and Rena helped Ladybug to stand as she captured it in her yo-yo and released it.

 

“Man, that’s really cool.”

 

Ladybug and Rena agreed.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

A trip to the hospital, of which was against Ladybug’s better judgement but was administered anyways, revealed that Ladybug suffered nothing too extreme from the fall, just a sprained right ankle and a few bruises. It was made very clear that without the magical protection of the suit, Ladybug and Rena would’ve gotten hurt a lot more. With that taken into account, Ladybug was discharged from the hospital. Before she could go home, Rena had to give back the Miraculous, so they bid goodbye to Chat and ducked into a particularly empty alley.

 

“Are you sure you’ll be okay, Ladybug? You don’t need any help?” Rena asked tentatively, delivering the fox miraculous to Ladybug’s cupped hands.

 

“I’ll be _fine_ , Alya, don’t worry about me.”

 

How did Alya not see it before? The amount of just _Marinette_ in that phrase was astonishing.

 

“How come I can’t be a permanent superhero?” Alya asked softly, curiously.

 

Ladybug blanched, as if asking herself that, and asked, “Why? What’s the point of another one?”

 

“Well, y’know, I could be there for, like, extra help. Things would go a whole lot faster, and I’d be there incase something- y’know, uh, happens, like today.” She gave a worried look for a moment, then perked up. “Oh, maybe we could all be a big team! Me, you, Chat, and Nino!”

 

“...And Choe.”

 

“Well, Chloe too, if she insists.” The girls let out a laugh as Ladybug slipped the fox pendant into its box.

 

“Well, it’s not up to me, not really,” Ladybug sighed.

 

‘Who’s it up to then?”

 

As if on cue (and looking back, it most likely was), Master Fu sidestepped around the corner, walking slowly but with a purpose up to the girls with his arms folded behind his back. “Why, me, of course,” he practically singsonged. As per usual, the mysterious old man knew exactly where to be and when.

 

Alya gasped and whipped around, facing towards the old man in a flower-printed shirt. _This guy_ was in charge?

 

“You must be Alya- or should I say, Rena Rouge. My name is Master Fu- nice to meet you,” he said calmly, sticking out a hand.

 

Alya took it respectfully. “Nice to meet you too, sir.”

 

“Good evening, Ladybug.” Ladybug gave a small bow out of respect, smiling.

 

“Alya, I am the guardian of the Miraculous- it’s my job to keep them safe. Now, might I ask, what was it you two were discussing before?”

 

Alya took a deep breath, and Ladybug let out a long one.

 

“Well, I mean, Master Fu sir, we were talking about what it would be like to have all of us be permanent superheroes. Did you see what happened this morning? Ladybug fell and Chat couldn’t save her in time so I rescued her and then Chat went and did the thing where he-”

 

Master Fu held up a silent hand and upon Alya’s response said calmly, “I’m well aware of what transpired today, Madam Césaire. I will tell you, I have taken your proposal into account before. Now that we have been made acutely aware of the possible consequences of having merely two heroes be there for each other and all of Paris, I’ve decided to accept this decision and promote you, Rena Rouge, as well as Carapace and Queen Bee, to permanent superheroes.”

 

Alya and Ladybug gasped in surprise, Alya exclaiming “Hell yeah!” as the two high-fived enthusiastically.

 

“You, Alya, are to fulfill your duties as Rena Rouge to provide assistance to all of your team members, in any and all events of an akuma unless directed otherwise by me, Ladybug, or Chat Noir. Trixx will fill you in on how to handle such a momentous task.”

 

The girls hugged happily, and once unwound Ladybug handed the miraculous box back to Alya with a joyous smile. She in turn faced Master Fu and thanked him with a bow, of which he returned.

 

A high-pitched beeping alerted the three that Ladybug’s time was nearly up, so Master Fu beckoned her to come to his building to deliver the miraculouses to the others. The two bid Alya goodbye, and she started in the direction of home, practically bursting with energy.

 

Ooooh, she was going to _love_ this.

**Author's Note:**

> MMmmmmMmmMmMMmmmm---MmmMMmmMMmmmMMmmMmmmmmm
> 
>  
> 
> d e l i c i o u s


End file.
